Halloween is one of the most fun holidays of the fall season. It’s that one night of the year when your kids dress in either scary costumes or cute costumes and go get all the candy they could ever want. The anticipation is high and the waiting for that night is hard. Keep them happy and laughing while they wait by telling them some Halloween jokes. Here are some of our favorites!
If you have a favorite Halloween joke, leave a comment and let us know so we can add to our collection!
HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR KIDS
Like all of our jokes, these are clean and kid-friendly so you can share them with your kids without worry! Whether you’re looking for some funny HALLOWEEN jokes or just need some general funny and scary jokes, check out our favorites!
Q: What monster plays tricks on Halloween?
Q: What kind of music do mummies love?
A: Wrap music.
Q: How do ghosts wash their hair?
A: With shamboo.
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Q: What is a monster’s favorite dessert?
A: I scream!
Q: What fruit do scarecrows love the most?
Q: What does a witch use to do her hair?
Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A: He is mist.
Q: What room does a ghost not need?
A: A living room.
Q: How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Q: When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?
A: If you are a mouse.
Q: What do you call two witches living together?
Q: What happens when a vampire goes in the snow?
A: Frost bite!
Q: What’s big, scary and has three wheels?
A: A monster riding a tricycle!
Q: Why don’t vampires have more friends?
A: Because they are a pain in the neck.
Q: What position does a ghost play in hockey?
Q: What do you call a witch who goes to the beach?
A: A sand-witch.
Q: What do you give a vampire when he’s sick?
Q: What kinds of pants do ghosts wear?
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A: A blood orange.
Q: What did the little boy say when she had to choose between a tricycle and candy?
A: Trike or Treat!
Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A: Dayscare centers!
Q: What candy do you eat on the playground?
A: Recess pieces.
Q: What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A: A blood hound.
Q: What is a ghost’s nose full of?
Q: What do birds say on Halloween?
A: Trick or Tweet!
Q: What do owls say when they go trick or treating?
A: Happy Owl-ween!
Q: Where do ghosts use their boats?
A: The Eerie Canal.
Q: What song do vampires hate?
A: “You Are My Sunshine”
Q: What type of monster loves dance music?
A: The boogieman
Q: What’s a ghosts favorite fruit?
Q: Who are cousins of the werewolf?
A: What-wolf and When-wolf
Q: What’s a ghosts favorite body of water?
A: Lake Eerie.
Q: What’s a ghosts favorite desert?
A: Boo-berry pie.
Q: What do you call a spirit who gets too close to a camp fire?
A: A toasty ghosty.
Q: What kind of makeup do witches wear?
Q: When does a ghost eat breakfast?
A: In the moaning.
Q: What do werewolves read to their children before bed?
A: Hairy tails
Q: What do Italian ghosts eat for dinner?
Q: Why was the ghost such a messy eater?
A: Because he was always goblin’.
Q: What tops off a monster’s ice cream sundae?
A: Whipped scream.
Q: What do spirits send their friends while on vacation?
Q: What do they grow in the Halloweenland garden?
Q: Which of the witch’s friends was good at baseball?
A: The bat.
Q: What do they use to clean the ice during the Halloweenland hockey game?
A: A Zombieoni.
Q: What is a witch with poison ivy called ?
A: An itchy witchy.
Q: Where do ghosts buy their milk and eggs?
A: At the ghost-ery store.
Q: Where do spirits go to send their mail?
A: The ghost office.
Q: How do you fix a broken Jack-o-lantern?
A: With a pumpkin patch.
Q: When do skeletons laugh?
A: When something tickles their funny bones.
Q: Why do witches ride on brooms?
A: Because vacuum cleaners are too expensive.
Q: Where do ghosts go on vacation?
Q: Why did the vampire like baseball?
A: Every night he got to turn into a bat.
Q: What do ghosts eat for lunch?
A: Boo-logna sandwiches.
Q: What do you call a skeleton that sits around all day?
A: A lazy bone.
Q: What do witches put in their hair?
A: Scare spray.
Q: What kind of mistakes do spirits make?
Q: Why was the vampire artist so famous?
A: Because he was great at drawing blood.
Q: What city do most werewolves live?
A: Howllywood, California.
Q: What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and says quack-quack?
A: Count Duckula.
Q: What is a vampire’s favorite candy?
Q: Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
A: To stop his coffin.
Q: How do monsters tell their future?
A: They read their horror-scope.
Q: What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
A: A boo-tie.
Q: Which building did the vampire visit in New York?
A: The Vampire State Building.
Q: Which amusement park ride do ghosts like the most?
A: Roller ghosters.
Q: How do ghosts like their coffee?
A: Dark with extra scream.
Q: What do you call a witch in the desert?
A: The Sandwich.
Q: What’s the problem with twin witches?
A: You never know which witch is which!
Q: Where do ghosts like to swim?
A: The Dead sea.
Q: What kind of music do ghosts listen to?
A: Spiritual music.
Q: What was the ghosts favorite book?
A: Romeo and Ghouliet
Q: What happened to the witch with the upside-down nose?
A: Every time she sneezed her hat blew off.
Q: What’s the first thing witches do in the morning?
A: They wake up.
Q: What do monkey ghosts like to eat?
Q. How does a witch tell the time?
A. With her witch-watch.
Q: What do goblins drink when they’re hot and thirsty?
Q: What is a monster’s favorite snack food?
A: Ghoul scout cookies.
Q: What kind of roads do spirits haunt?
A: Dead Ends.
Q: Where do vampire students eat their lunch?
A: In the casketeria.
Q: Where do most monsters live?
A: North and South Scare-olina.
Q: Who was the most famous ghost detective?
A: Sherlock Moans.
Q: Which sport do vampires like to play the most?
Q: How can you make a witch itch?
A: Take out the W.
Q: What was the ghost’s favorite party game?
Q: What do you tell candy corn after it graduates from high school?
Q: What is funny and it tastes good?
A: Halloween Candy jokes.
Q: What’s the hottest candy on Halloween?
Q: What’s the happiest candy on Halloween?
A: Almond Joy.
Q: What kind of corn can you eat but never grows?
A: Candy corn.
FREE PRINTABLE KIDS HALLOWEEN JOKES AND PUNS
Be sure to download your FREE Halloween jokes printable. You can print these jokes to share with your kids. They work great as lunchbox notes in the month of October!
Whether you’re looking for jokes that work well for October, these Halloween jokes will have your whole family laughing together!
COMMENT AND TELL US YOUR FAVORITE HALLOWEEN JOKES!
MORE HALLOWEEN JOKES
**Click the picture below to save these jokes to Pinterest so you don’t lose them!**